Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Frustration




Plateau.

I'm fuming.
I've plateau'd out, for the second day in a row.
I'm obviously fucking up somewhere diet-wise, that I haven't noticed.

So far today, I haven't eaten anything.
Desperate times, desperate measures, blah blah blah blah....

Normally I'd have eaten some form of breakfast by now.
But nah, fuck that.
What do I want?
A breakfast burrito, or a thigh gap?
No. Fucking. Brainer.

But why oh why must I have the attention span of a dead squirrel?
I need to focus.
Focus, focus, focus.
As if somehow by saying the word over and over again, I'll miraculously be 99 lbs.

Often times, I've thought to myself.
What if I just woke up one day, at my goal weight?
Personally, I'd flip a dick.
I want, no, need to work for my achievements.
I almost need the sick self-hatred.
And that thought sickens me more than anything else.


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